As it happens to many people I thought that my life was perfect, that I had everything a man could want: family, health, work, friends, some money… So why did I want the figure of a divine father? Really for what? Moreover, I always thought that God was an inconvenience in my life, that He was a complication. Maybe that’s why I decided to separate him from my life voluntarily, consciously until I almost made him disappear.
As in the parable of the prodigal son, We took everything that was offered to us in advance: youth, a good position, health, fun and hundreds of material things that were supposed to make us happy and we went out to live our life. At first everything was fine, it was a ‘non stop’ life. But as the years go by, things sometimes get complicated, they twist and not everything is as perfect as we supposed. Then it is when we miss a loving father who loves us, guides us, advises us and accompanies us in solitude and emptiness.
This yearning gradually takes over our hearts darkening and petrifying it, and at the end, we become completely insensible to true love. It’s then when we feel a terrible interior emptiness. This emptiness makes us very vulnerable and defenseless and as it is evident the devil takes advantage of it to possess our soul. How? It offers us all kinds of comfortable, effective and ‘easy-to-get’ substitutes to fill that emptiness. Those substitutes are easy to digest and their effects are not long lasting. And when the effects pass, the emptiness is still there, nothing is able to fill it.
And our pride is now so strong that it doesn’t allow us to recognize our loneliness and prevents us from recognizing that we need help. We need someone to take us by the hand and rescue us from the abyss. Someone who loves us as we are, someone who accepts us despite having squandered all the good that was given to us in the past. We definitely need a true father, God.
How can we be so blind to have God in front of our eyes and not see Him? He extends his hand to grab us and his love is infinite, unlimited and unconditional, and even so we reject him, without hesitation. It’s amazing. There is nothing comparable to, that after a long time, your father sees you in the distance arriving dejected and runs to receive you, kissing you and embracing you, without reproaching you nothing of your past and whispering to you: «Be calm my son, my beloved son. All your Sadness, insecurities, weaknesses and worries are now mine too. I love you I love you. Follow me, come with me…».
This is what I experienced in the ‘Walk to Emmaus’ and since then I just want to embrace Him. May He who guides my life and I humbly fulfill His will. He is my father, and as a good father he only wants what’s good for me, although sometimes he allows things or situations to happen to me that are incomprehensible, painful and meaningless in my life. Never mind, I am convinced that God has a plan designed for me and I have decided to trust Him fully.
So let God always take you by his hand. His infinite goodness and mercy have no limits, even though many times you are faced with difficult or very difficult situations. But knowing that you have Him with you, by your side, is the best guarantee that everything will now go well. He only wants your happiness and salvation. Abandoning yourself to Him is the best cure for your past, present and future wounds.
Since then, as it says a beautiful prayer that I recite daily:
I abandon myself into your hands;
do with me what you will.
Whatever you may do,
I thank you.
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only your will be done in me,
and in all your creatures.
I wish no more than this, O Lord.
Into your hands I commend my soul;
I offer it to you
with all the love of my heart,
for I love you, Lord,
and so need to give myself,
to surrender myself into your hands,
and with boundless confidence,
for you are my Father.
Blessed Brother Charles de Focauld